Joke

SunnyGirl · Posted: 2/26/2008, 3:27 am Post subject: Joke

Tough Love

A dying man smells his favorite oatmeal raisin cookies cooking downstairs. It takes all the strength he has left but he gets up from the bed and crawls down the stairs. He sees the cookies cooling on the counter and staggers over to them. As he reaches for one, his wife's wrinkled hand reaches out, smacks his and she yells:

"No, you can't have those! They're for the funeral!"
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Truestar · Moderator

I've heard that one, there's plenty of those and each variation is just as funny!

If I can think up of good ones I'll post them. Laughing

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SunnyGirl · Posted: 2/27/2008, 7:23 am Post subject:

The Funeral Stone.

Sam died. His will provided $30,000 for an elaborate funeral. As the last guests departed the affair, his wife, Sarah turned to her oldest and dearest friend. "Well, I'm sure Sam would be pleased" she said.

"I'm sure you're right," replied Jody, who lowered her voice and leaned in close. "How much did this really cost?"

"All of it," said Sarah. "Thirty thousand."

"No!" Jody exclaimed. "I mean, it was very nice, but $30,000?"

Sarah answered, "The funeral was $6,500. I donated $500 to the synagogue. The whisky, wine and snacks were another $500. The rest went for the Memorial Stone.."

Jody computed quickly. "$22,500 for a Memorial Stone? My God, how big is it?"

"Two and a half carats..."
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